When I was in high school, I remember being in the living room with my parents. I was preoccupied with something, sitting in the floor. Mom and Dad were sitting in their respective chairs, talking about this and that. Although I do not remember much about the context (something about someone dying, etc.), I remember one bit of the conversation:
Dad said, "You know, Emily's going to be young when we die."
Until then, I had never thought of that--I could spend more years on earth without parents than I would with parents. Right now, I'm at 28 and will soon lose my father.
This weekend's trip to my parent's house did not reveal Dad to be bed-ridden, unable to speak, or on life-support. It did, however, show his brain cancer to be aggressive and destructive. He cannot see well. Because of that and other effects from the tumor, he walks very slowly with his hand out to guide him. He often bumps into things. He becomes very confused directionally, not knowing how to turn around or sit down properly, or which way to go--like what chair to sit in, door to enter, etc. He doesn't do well with processing more than one thing at a time. In fact, he didn't recognize me when I walked through the door. All in all, his processing is slower. Eating, bathing, drinking, walking, talking, and on and on takes much longer.
On the good side, he is still "with it." His knowledge and memory retention is wonderful. He can talk your ear off, follow your conversations, contribute to the conversation and such. But, he may leave his chair, stand in the middle of the room, or just start walking aimlessly with no notice and for no reason. Then, you have to say, "Dad, look here. Here's your chair. You can sit right here."
My father's health development brought many family members to Van Buren this weekend. I will post pictures later. This was the best weekend my often chaotic, dysfunctional family has experienced in more than 15 years. In fact, I cannot remember--literally--the last time all of my siblings were at my parents' house. On top of that, I REALLY can't remember when no one tried to kill the other--ha! I'm attributing such a gracious visit as a gift from a very gracious God. How He ministers to us in indescribable, deep ways.
The next few days will be filled with doctor's visit, more trips to Van Buren, and researching home health options and hospice care. We may not need it, but I want to be prepared, as do all my siblings.
Again, if you are the praying kind, please keep my family in your prayers. We need it!
