Perils in Homeownership

While the recent days have been full of fun and treats, "real life" has peeped its head into our celebratory world. Let me explain.

On the way home from the airport on the 11th, we noticed some funny business with the car. The next day we, er, Bryan toted the car to the dealership. Thankfully the tab wasn't too devastating; annoying, but not devastating.

Cue cable collapse. Of course, Charter DVR isn't a necessity for life . . . but when you are on a staycation, one does have dreams of vegging on the couch catching up on missed shows. Alas, the cable repairman had to make an appearance at the house.

And then the refrigerator . . . the ice machine and water dispenser decided to dispense on the floor instead of its proper location. Thus, the appliance repairman made a visit too. That project is still out of commission until a part makes its way to Texas. You know it's bad when you hear phrases like: "I've never seen anything like this." "This type of part goes on a car. Why is it in your fridge?" "Uh-oh, I think that broke." Ahem.

And the apex of "instances" occurred last night when I was tidying up for dinner guests. As I dusted in our formal living room, I noticed two . . . then three . . . then five wasps in the window sill. Since we had a wasp infestation last fall thanks to a motherly wasp who fancies our chimney as a perfect nesting area, I quickly killed the pests and searched diligently for just-hatched vermin. Bryan, at my request, started our gas fireplace to kill any remaining wasps. Just as he closed the flue, we heard a crash; the nest fell to the bottom of the fireplace. Thirty wasps or so swarmed into our living room.

I screamed.

Bryan began fly-swatting as never before seen. I quickly snatched the wasp spray, only to stand in the hall yelling, "There's one. Ooohh, by the door. On the ceiling . . . [scream] on the couch . . . " Once the initial impact was ore, Bryan asked for our hand-held vac, along with its super long drapery attachment. Making all ghost-busters proud, I carried in the vac into the infested area for my husband to bravely catch and kill every wasp . . . we thought. At dinner, a couple hours after the fiasco, one lone wasp nosedived into my HAIR at the dinner table. Imagine, just imagine. Thankfully, my husband again saved me. And just to be doubly sure, we're running a fire again tonight. Adios, wasps!