This Time Last Year

It all started last August. The self-appointed deadline of ending our wait to adopt came near. Yet, we had no second child to welcome home. In a rare move, I detracted my previous commitment to this deadline thanks to a sense of desperation I never ever wish to feel again. Graciously, my kind husband agreed. In retrospect, I have a sneaky suspicion these desperate feelings were an unexplainable maternal, Divine intervention. You see, my second baby was on her way.

October came and went with an updated home study and the comfort of "doing something," but the weight of waiting never left. November I wore the waiting like a heavy coat.

Then, on November 14, we learned about a baby girl yet to be born. We chose to show our profile book to the birthmother that next Monday.

Monday came and went and no news from the adoption agency.

Tuesday came and nearly went. I sent an email only to receive the reply: "There isn't any updates to send along to you at this time."

I was totally suspicious and over-analytical of every word, the order of the sentence, and so forth. How much longer until there was a concrete update?

On Wednesday, while waiting in the drive-thru line at Chick-fil-A, I get the call: Not only did the birthmother choose us, but the baby was also born that Monday, November 17. This was why we weren't informed. A lot had been developing faster than expected!

But there was a catch or two, and the adoption agency wasn't comfortable placing with us until the week after Thanksgiving.

So I lived with the possibility, a likelihood of a baby girl. Maybe mine. Maybe not mine. Willing December to make its appearance as quickly as possible. That is also a heaviness.

The Tuesday before Thanksgiving, we met the birthmother -- a delightful, smart, loving young women. The meeting went so well, and we felt hope.

So this time last year, I was in the middle of a muddle: I went from not knowing if a second child was in the cards for us to waiting for a response to cautiously rejoicing for a girl all to wait for several more days not knowing so much until finally . . . .

On this day last year, I met her -- my baby daughter, Louisa Bryn Caroline. I loved her at first sight. My waiting was over; my heart burst with joy and thankfulness -- two sentiments I continue to embrace one year later. A family of three became four.

So if you are waiting for something or someone, don't despair. Who knows what will be this time next year.

Happy family day, my loves!

Our first photo as the Youree Four!